Childhood Hot Buttons

When I was growing up, my mother took great care not to create competition between my older sister and myself. She was very clear about who was good at what, but she also was clear that if it was my…

By Chandrama Anderson, LMFT Recently I was looking at one of my journals from the early 80s when I was 20 or 21 years old. I came across an entry about an interaction with my guy of that time. He…

By Vera Shadle, Process Graduate Why quality therapy is worth every single cent: Super Bowl weekend just up the road from the Big Event, and our local grocery store is pretty busy. While I’m exchanging pleasantries with the cashier, at…

Hone Your Parenting Skills

Parents often complain, “I sound just like my mother/father.” And you probably do sound like your parents. We learn to be parents by watching our own parents during our childhoods. Yes, of course you do some things differently. Your parents…

On the right road?

Sometimes it is difficult to figure out if you are on the right road, or the wrong one. The right road hums inside you. Even when there are difficulties, the direction is clear. There is often an inner knowing that…

They Never Said It Was Going To Be Easy

When I was a child, I completely bought into the “Happily ever after” myth. Life would only get better, once I grew up. I would find my handsome prince, have 2.3 children, and live in a house in the suburbs…

Do you catch yourself doing things, making choices, that are not in your own best interest? I certainly do. For me it often has to do with spending time on social media, or playing solitaire on my computer. Why is…

Cultivating Collaboration by Jim Tamm

This blog is a Ted Talk by Jim Tamm, Process graduate, former judge, and co-author of Radical Collaboration. “Cultivating Collaboration: Don’t be so Defensive!” 15 minutes about managing your defensiveness, it includes the why and how. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjSTNv4gyMM Jim Tamm, photo…

Sometimes I find myself making negative judgments about people I do not even know. We all do it in traffic: “That idiot just cut in front of me.” And we make snap judgments of others when we see them, whether…

The following story was told to me by a Process client at the end of her first week in the Process. The relevant (to this story) teaching that occurs during the first week is that we learn to identify the…

Whenever we do something over and over, we are practicing that movement or behavior. We are training ourselves to continue doing it, and to get better at it. In many cases it is very helpful: I practice yoga to strengthen…

Last week I visited my daughter, her husband, and my three grandchildren in Texas. I am the kind of person (“Two” on the Enneagram) who integrates into the situation at hand. I had a wonderful time with the kids, helping…

It’s tax season, a time which is often fraught with procrastination. Many of us have trouble with procrastination. We procrastinate when the action at hand has some expected negative impact on us, or is unpleasant in some way. Filling out…